the big news

my apologies to Lori, but I’d like to interrupt this inconsistent stream of one New Zealand travel log to actually post my big news on my blog.. because it’s consuming my life, so I figure it’s pretty much the biggest thing that’s ever happened to me.
actually.. I don’t figure. I know it is.

are you ready?

okay.

I’M GETTING MARRIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

everyone in my close association is already aware of this fact, but YOU.. internets.. might not be! so in the interest of information, here is my happiness being shared with the world!

and here is our save-the-date:

and because I enjoy using my blog as something of a journal for later in life.. here are the FAQ’s about our relationship:

Is he from New Zealand?
No, he is from Tonga. He lives in New Zealand with his brother and is working there.

How did you meet a Tongan in New Zealand?
We served together on our missions. No, we never really served around each other so we did not know each other well on the mission. We only met a couple of times at zone conferences and then reconnected 3 years later and it turns out that he is the man of my dreams. I visited him in New Zealand last month. We have been together for 7 months now, and will have been dating for a year by the time we get married.

Will you live in New Zealand?
Yes, the plan is for me to live with him in New Zealand until he gets his green card and we can come back to the states. The immigration lawyer I spoke with told me that the process usually takes 9 months to a year. However, that entire plan hinges on whether or not he gets his work permit in New Zealand to come through or not within the next couple of months. If he doesn’t get his work permit, we will still get married in NZ in April, but he will have to go back to Tonga soon after that. I will either go to Tonga or, more likely, come back to the states to work and establish a life here so he can join me as soon as possible. (yayyyyy immigration! *fail trombone*)

Why are you getting married in New Zealand instead of the states?
Because we have looked at all of the options for visas to get him here, from visitor’s visas to fiance visas to student visas, and all of those options are so expensive or time-consuming or difficult to get that it just isn’t going to work out that way. After much research and discussion, our option boiled down to getting married in New Zealand as the best (and only) way. I know… my life is REALLY rough. 🙂

Will you be having a reception in Utah?
We will be having an open house in Utah once we are able to get back to the states. Because it could be up to a year after the fact, we probably won’t call it a “reception,” but we will have some kind of event so everybody can meet him and celebrate with us.

Is your family going?
My parents are coming for sure and they are working on getting my siblings there if possible. We’ll see how costs work out with expensive plane tickets.

Can you work in New Zealand?
I can’t unless I get a work permit, which basically requires a job offer and a lot of paperwork and time waiting for immigration to approve it. I can if all that works out, but if not I’ll just be living with him there as a good little housewife.

How did the engagement happen?
The actual proposal and ring part won’t happen until a few weeks before the wedding when I can get back over there. We figured when we had our temple sealing officially booked then we were pretty much officially engaged and we better start announcing it. in other words, we are engaged by date. So the ring/proposal part is still to come.

and I love him.

now.. all this being said, I have a question. because I need some validation.

is it normal that I feel like I am losing it?
I mean..
back up the info truck.
I am going to school and working full-time, am still in the process of recovering from what we think was pneumonia, am planning an international wedding (i.e. about 100 times more stressful than planning a wedding where you actually live), planning a move across the world, and dealing with immigration. I am stressed and oversensitive and exhausted.
I have gathered from friends and family and hearsay that it’s normal for brides to be.. overwhelmed?
estressed?
cray cray?
when wedding planning…
but  I feel like I need to get my act together.
and I just want this semester to be over because my head’s totally somewhere else.
please tell me I’m normal.
..whatever that means.

okay, that’s all.

you may carry on with your lives having just been made a little happier by this bit of sunshine from my world.

guys.. I get to marry my hot Tongan husband in New Zealand!!! my dreams are coming true!
ahhhh!!!!!!!!!!! 🙂
pinch me!

actually, don’t. we’ll just pretend you did in case you wake me up from a really long detailed dream that I’d rather not be woken from. can’t be too careful.

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5 thoughts on “the big news

  1. Congrats Aubrey! I hope everything works out for you guys with the green card and visa and all that. And since I’m outspoken and all that, I’m going to go ahead and give you a suggestion: do everything you can to not have to come back to the states and send him back to Tonga. I know it won’t really be up to you guys exactly what happens, but Husband and I spent our first year living in separate states, and it’s really something I regret. I wish we’d just waited to get married until after he could come back, so we could live together for our first year. Just something to think about! Long distance is even harder when you’re newlyweds. Again, congratulations!! Very happy for you!

  2. Aubrey, this makes my heart happy on this Sabbath day as i’m reading it for the first time, carry on with your life, things will turn out, wedding planning is stressful but adding immigration to it is a tad bit too much. Mote is a great catch and so are you. I am really happy for the both of you. ‘Ofa atu.

  3. yay! and i’m glad you posted this on here. i’m sure some of us non-close friends were wondering about “the story”. not that that matters… you are living your life and don’t need to explain anything to anyone! i love that you found an exotic romance! how dreamy! congrats 🙂

  4. Congratulations!!! And yes, it is completely normal. My wedding was in Utah, and I didn’t have to deal with all of that immigration stuff and I was extremely stressed when I was engaged. In fact, I probably had a freak out session once or twice a day. I have never been so stressed in my life. So be easy on yourself, take lots of naps, get your nails done, whatever you need to do to feel a little better. And if you’re freaking out, just know it isn’t forever, and you will feel normal again.

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