why I hate guys.

maybe hate is a strong word, but sometimes that’s exactly how I feel. and unfortunately, in my experience, Mormon guys often seem to be the worst. they are inconsiderate and lazy and picky and flaky and all sorts of irritating. why is it that other guys treat me better and care more about me than they do? shouldn’t they have.. you know.. higher morals and stuff? (this is why I love the church for my testimony of the doctrine rather than all of the people in it.)

I will give you examples to support my theory. all of this happened just this past Saturday. we won’t even delve into past events.

exhibit a:

we will call him Tom. Tom and I made plans to go to dinner Saturday evening about 2 weeks ago, because we hadn’t seen each other in ages. Tom used to be pretty much smitten with me back in the day, and I returned the feelings. then something changed… to this day, I do not know what it was. but he no longer feels the way he used to, that much is apparent.
anyway, we make these plans 2 weeks ago… Thursday, we confirm them again. so this afternoon I say, “Tom, what am I doing tonight?”
he says, “I don’t know if I can go anymore because one of my friends from CA just came out to hang out this weekend and we are supposed to go out tonight.”
in a matter of about .2375 seconds, I have the following reactions go through my head:
1. wtf.
2. so… when you were planning on telling me this, you inconsiderate jerk? was the plan to just leave me hanging all night and hope I wouldn’t notice?
3. convenient that we can’t all hang out together, isn’t it? you are full of it. and you know exactly what I mean by “it.”
but I say, “Oh.. Ok.”
he says,” Sorry I forgot they were coming until they got here yesterday.”
I say, “Ok.”
if I would have said anything more than those two letters, angry and/or foul words would have come out of my fingers and I didn’t want to go there.

exhibit b:

we’ll call this one… Loco. because he is maybe clinically insane? who knows.

so here’s the story. Loco is from L.A. last year he he added me on Facebook thinking I was someone he knew from his mission, I thought I was supposed to know him because he looked familiar, so I accepted the friend request. we started talking and he became increasingly infatuated as time went by. I was flattered, but not entirely interested. mostly indifferent. then I started dating the d-bag who later broke my heart and Loco took it as a green light to get a girlfriend literally like the next day.
so over the next several months he would text me every so often and still be flirtatious and tell me how much he still liked  me and that his relationship status could change, etc. I brushed it off. he would ask me why he still liked me through their drama-filled rocky relationship and I would say, “I don’t know, Loco.. why do you still like me?” yet he continued to maintain contact.
then he told me he was coming to Utah for a weekend for a wedding with his lady friend and asked if we could hang out. I said ok, but he starts insisting that we hang out just the two of us. I tell him he needs to tell his lady friend. I don’t want to be sneaking around all shady-like, and she can come if she wants. so we decided we’d do something late Saturday night.
I hadn’t heard from him for a few days beforehand and didn’t know if I was even still going to see him. I texted him the day before, but no response.  so Saturday evening rolls around, and around 5ish I get a phone call from him. he asks me if I can come pick him up right then to hang out. he is in Provo. Provo is an hour away from me. I tell him that. he says, “oh. ok.” but still wants me to come down. I tell him I’m going to bring my sister because we were going to go to dinner anyway. (plus I wanted to eliminate any one-on-one possibilities) so then he calls me about 10 minutes later and says he is going to Salt Lake to do something for the wedding instead, so maybe we can hang out later at like 9 or something. I remind him for about the 1000th time that I am WAY closer to SLC than I am to Provo. he says “oh, ok” and that he will call me to meet up there a little later.
so Haley and I venture off to Gateway for some grub and the Victoria’s Secret sale. it was fab.
about 9pm we are done and I call him to see if he is planning on meeting up with us or if we should just bail and go home. no answer. I call one more time and leave a message that I’m leaving SLC. we go home.
about an hour later, I get the following message on Facebook:

I see that that u keep tryin to call me. I havent answered for a reason and I would appreciate it if u didn’t call me back. I am in a relationship with a really amazing girl and I want to be faithful to her. Given our history together I feel it is inappropriate for us to communicate. I hope you understand and respect my wishes. I wish u the best and hope u find a worthy priesthood holder who will love u as much as I love my girl. She is my everything. Good luck in all u do.

uhh… I think this is the place where you insert the “wtf” face?

so I respond:

wow. ok firstly, you are the one who called me wanting to hang out. secondly you said you’d call me to meet up in salt lake so I was just trying to figure out what was going on before I left and went home. and thirdly, I told you to tell your gf about it so we wouldn’t be sneaking around all shady. fourthly, you’re the one who has maintained contact between us all this time. I only called you to follow up with the plans you had pushed for. I’m glad you’re happy with your gf. I wouldn’t have it otherwise and I wasn’t trying to hook up.
good luck and take care.

then a little while later, I get a phone call from him. not only did I completely not want to talk to him, but I was at a party. sent to voicemail!
he leaves a message saying basically the same kind of stuff. it was absolutely ridiculous.

good thing he is so magnanimous as to shut me down when he was the one pursuing. I’m really relieved he did that. his girlfriend is soooo lucky.

homygosh I love dating so much! it’s the best invention mankind has ever come up with! guys are so awesome at life!


4 thoughts on “why I hate guys.

  1. dating really sucks. i found some real winners like these in the past. i know we’re like best friends and everything but here’s my advice 🙂 i think you just need to focus on finding someone who has the qualities you want and someone who you get along with and go for it. get him. that’s all there is to it. it may sound kind of beotchy but i’m a big fan of playing hard to get and really – just making the guy jealous so they don’t mess around. guys tend to bend over backwards for you when they think you don’t care – kind of messed up but it seals the deal. you’re too nice! play the game and get what you want! 🙂

  2. boo. these stories make me want to go all karate on these non-gentlemen. & my personal opinon, breezer, you’re ok to be a hater right now. also loco’s gf –que suerte tiene. sad she doesn’t know what a loser he really is. if this is any consolation… you. are. stunning. and wonderful. let’s find you a bf that has even an ounce of the characteristics YOU have… then there would for sure be fireworks. te quiero mija.

  3. Oh wow. I often have thoughts like “girls are ridiculous”, but I’m going to just agree with you here. Guys suck. Loco probably got busted by his girlfriend and didn’t have the cajones to own up to it. You deserve better, my friend. Much, much better.

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